![]() ![]() So, there is a duplicitous aspect to it, and not merely, “You win. It’s giving the other cues that you’re on board, that you’re interacting with them. They are, in a sense, getting enough cues that the person’s okay.From my perspective, appeasement is not just doing or fulfilling the will of the other. ![]() “Often, people see appeasement as part of an asymmetrical relationship, a poor marriage, or a poor social relationship.But appeasement is much more of a complicated interaction, one where the other individual – the aggressive one, or the controlling person – basically doesn’t think that anything’s going on that’s wrong. Stephen will also explain how polyvagal theory can better inform how you work with this trauma response – and points out a well-intentioned approach that might actually do harm to these patients. In the video below, Stephen Porges, PhD shares one common misconception about patients who “please and appease.” One of those defense responses is “please and appease.” You may have also heard expert practitioners call this the fawn response to trauma.īut because researchers and experts are still learning about this response, there have been some misconceptions about it. ![]() You’ve probably heard of fight, flight, and even the freeze response to trauma.īut there are some newer defense responses – ones that experts have only recently begun to name and understand – that are critical to our clinical work. ![]()
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